Brendan Fraser opens up about his autistic son
Brendan Fraser spoke to Howard Stern on his SiriusXM radio show in support of his Oscar campaign and his movie, The Whale. He told Howard that at events, if he spots anyone on the autistic spectrum, he tries to make the space and time to spend with them in a way that makes them comfortable. What I didn’t know is that Brendan oldest son, Griffin, is autistic, which is why Brendan makes a point for meeting those folks on their terms. Brendan opened up to Howard about the shock of receiving Griffin’s diagnosis and how he wouldn’t change a thing about him.
Brendan Fraser is opening up about what it’s like being a parent of a child with autism.
Speaking about his experiences raising son Griffin, 20, during a recent sitdown with Howard Stern for his SiriusXM radio show, The Whale actor, 54, talked about making an effort to reach out to fans with autism at public events.
“There’s just people who are, for whatever their personal reasons are, really fulfilled or happy to make your acquaintance, if only for a few moments. And I find that really gratifying and affirming, and sometimes there are those who I can clock from across a convention room hall, who I can tell right away, ‘He’s on the spectrum,’ ” the actor shared.
“You know that there’s somebody who needs a little more love, a little more time because they’re autistic or they have Aspergers, and this is their world. This is where they belong,” he continues.
“No matter all of the noise surrounding the hysteria that goes into the whole celebrity bulls—, I always, always stop the train to have a moment with them.”
Fraser then recalled how he struggled to wrap his head around his son’s diagnosis when they first learned of it.
“When I found out my kid’s diagnosis at 22 or 24 months, I was crestfallen, to say the least. The first reaction that I had was, ‘I want to know how to fix this. What’s the cure? What does this mean?’ ” he said.
“You’re just hit with a baseball bat in the back of the side of the head. Like what? This isn’t the way it’s supposed to turn out,” he continued. “You blame yourself and you think, ‘my genealogy or ‘I smoked weed in college,’ you start blaming yourself over the reasons why.”
“Then you learn quickly that, I wouldn’t have any other way,” Fraser noted. “This kid has the most joy onboard of anyone I know, and he happens to be related to me as my son. I want to know what he thinks is so gut-bustingly funny all day long, in a genuine way, he’s cracking himself up. He loves to go for a ride in the car. It doesn’t matter where you’re taking him.”
Asked if Griffin’s diagnosis contributed to marital issues between him and ex-wife Afton Smith — with whom he also shares sons Leland, 16, and Holden, 18 — Fraser explained, “I paid more attention to my professional life than my personal one. That’s just me.”
“But with Griffin, all bets are off. Who cares what our problems are with each other? That doesn’t matter,” he pointed out. “It’s under a white flag, and we do anything and everything in support of this boy’s needs and his brother’s. That’s what I was able to commit to in the most meaningful way.
I know a few parents who reacted much like Brendan did when they received the autistic diagnosis. There was a point when it was portrayed as such a burden, as well. Schools and society have been more educated and people are more accepting, so hopefully it’s not received as dire now. I know it’s a challenge, but as Brendan said, there’s so much beauty that’s not emphasized in the lives of those on the spectrum. Brendan also talked a little about the lack of information he got from the medical community when Griffin was diagnosed. My friend’s son is Griffin’s age and diagnosed around the same time. I remember her trying to get information. Like Brendan said in his interview, there was limited knowledge on the subject. Years later though, there was so much more information out there and my friend’s kid was in the right therapy, the right school, the right recreational activities. It made a world of difference. And it makes a world of difference that people like Brendan translate their experiences into meaningful moments for people on the spectrum when he’s around them. Can you imagine what that must mean to them? I love this guy.
It is so gross that Howard asked Brendan if Griffin broke up his marriage on a radio show. Brendan gave a beautiful answer to an egregious question, though: “That’s just me.” Gotta love a person who takes responsibility. Brendan also took responsibility in his fight against the Golden Globes. When Howard asked if he felt other actors should have joined him in boycotting, Brendan said no, it was his fight, so he’ll fight it. And then he called the award a “hood ornament” *snerk*
These are Brendan’s younger sons, Leland and Holden
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Photo credit:Getty Images for AARP
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